A guy takes a girl to the State Fair for their first date

A guy takes a girl to the State Fair for their first date

The guy asks her what she wants to do, she says, "I want to get weighed."

So they visit the weighing booth, where the worker attempts to guess her weight.
He guesses wrong the first time, and she gets a teddy bear.

They get some funnel cake and play whack-a-mole, until the guy asks again, "I'm having a really great time with you. Now what do you want to do?"

She replies, "I want to get weighed!" Confused because they'd already done this, the boy takes her to a different weighing station, and the person there also guesses wrong. She wins a goldfish.

After some cotton candy and a merry go round ride, he asks for the third time, "Wow, babe, that was really fun, but what do you want to do now?"

Frustrated, the girl says, "I want to get WEIGHED!" And the guy is exasperated, but takes her to another weighing station, where the worker actually guesses her weight correctly.

But by now, the boy is really irritated and drops off the girl at home without so much as a kiss.

When the girl returned, her mother asked, "How was your date, sweetie?"

"Wousy," the girl replied.

Orchids Against The Shed

I would come down here every year, just like all the other snowbirds.

I actually got to enjoy what many would have seen as foolhardy, or simply difficult.  That drive.  1200 miles of it, one way.  Plus another 200 miles if I were going to Key West.

Or so.

Usually I'd stop off and get some things for people left behind Back Home.  It's always said like that "Back Home", in capitals.  I'm not completely sure, but if you listen to a tourist, they're always stressing things, including themselves.  The people out in California tended to use the phrase Back East in the same way.

Gone, not forgotten, not completely sure what to do about them.

All of that and none of it.  Language, it's a strange art.

One of my habits was to stop off at a big box store that sells plants, and pick up some Orchids to take back.  Plants that would cost at least $50 if not $100 could sometimes be found on a street corner here if you knew where to look.  Out of the back of a pickup in a scruffy part of town, 4 for $10 as the scrawl would say.

That's crept up to $4 for 20 more recently.

The plants were never that pricey to begin with.  I also knew they wouldn't last long once they got where they were going.  Those little seedlings rarely did.

That was because the plants were being put into a climate they didn't belong in.  Centrally heated air held little of the humidity they needed, and the drafts falling off of a 1950s tract home's single pane glass would freeze a dish of water if the conditions were right.

This was the same kind of plant. I picked it up in a mesh bag as a seedling.  No more than a few leaves and a stem or two.  I was promised beauty of an exotic flower, if the conditions were right.

Stuck into a wooden frame with some bits of bark, it grew well and put forth flowers.

That was a couple years ago.  I had noticed that that pot was getting sad.  The wood was now riddled with weak spots and there was practically nothing left of the Orchid Bark.

Whatever plants they get to chip up to make Orchid Bark that is

It got re-potted, and it did well.   Some of that mystery bark.  I also got creative with the Spanish Moss.  Great beards of the stuff grow in my nasty bougainvillea and need to be cut back.

The Spanish Moss now could play for ZZ Top, I tell you!

Fist fulls of the packing material like moss went into the Orchid pots as well as that sad lingering staghorn fern that we have back under the giant sea grape tree.

I think it liked it.  It stopped blooming for a while.  Simply paused.  Then it started sending out blossoms like it was going out of style.

All this from a seedling we didn't expect to survive.  Go fig!

The Little Mysteries Of Writing

Sitting down at a keyboard and writing, rambling on, can be an odd preoccupation.

You end up having a conversation with the inside of your skull.  An imaginary person is sitting there, and you're talking away.

It is possible to be entertaining, instructional, and engaging.  It is even possible to do all of that all at once.

It is possible to annoy, anger, and enrage.  I've done that as well.  In fact I've had someone once, thankfully just once, threaten me.

I laughed it off.  Being "On The Net" since the dusty old days of when dinosaurs roamed the Earth and the years started with 19, I have watched things go from being an academic discussion to the current obsession with cats, selfies, selfies with cats, and butts. 

Thanks to some pseudo-celebrities, it's even Selfies with Cats and with Butts. 

We're doomed I tell you, Doooomed!

This audience is always imagined, and sometimes it shows its head.  Mostly polite of course.  Most people are, or at least try to be, or at least think they are.

I've been at this for quite a while, and probably will continue for a while.  After all, it's easy to take a picture.  It's even easier to write about what you were thinking about.  I tend to do that and keep a few pictures in abeyance - that's in my back pocket.  Bang out a few paragraphs and so forth.

But you really never know what will get people excited. 

I've found that the recipes and the dog postings are very popular.  There are, however, some days you just don't understand.

This business with statistics.  You go into your favorite blogging platform and you can find out what people were looking at.  You also can do that with Google Analytics.  Both of which I do on a daily basis.

But I think I had a statistical anomaly that I am still scratching my head about.

Linux.

No don't run away.  It's not going to be banging on about how wonderful it is, or how it's the perfect thing to do with your old computer that got replaced on Xmas or Chanukah or your birthday. 

It is, but that's not the point.

While I do talk about Linux from time to time, I don't do it frequently enough to become an authority about the subject.  I'm kind of "middle of the road" with my knowledge on the subject.  Level 2 support, maybe Level 3, if you're taking notes.

When you look at your statistics and see that you got so many hits from so many places, you have to scratch your head.  Yeah that again.

I got 75 percent of my readers in yesterday from people sitting on a Linux computer.

3 out of 4 readers yesterday agreed that Linux was the platform of choice.

As opposed to about 1.5 percent of them in the real world.

Fifty times more people hit this blog with a Linux computer than in the real world?  Is my math correct?

Penguins unite!  You have nothing to lose but your Microsoft shackles!

As I write this on Windows 8.1 on a rather nice laptop...

Cross platform here.  Platform agnostic.

Dry, I'll stop that before I confuse you.

I just ... don't... get... it.

So instead I will just post a picture of the beach at Fort Lauderdale and call it even.  After all, my own family is suffering through some below 0 F wind chills today.  It won't even hit 70 here today or as we say "It's not a beach day ... unless you're from Minnesota".

But the Linux thing.... I just don't know!

Reminds me that I need to find the chip reader.  There's an i7 laptop that needs a copy of CentOS dropped on it for a server project I want to complete with Wordpress and a proper LAMP stack.

Facebook Privacy Policy Warning - Hoax

There are hoaxes and there are hoaxes.

I can still remember when I was a pre-teen running home from school at lunch so I could be with my dog because there was a rumor going around saying that a particular mall was going to cave in.  At lunch. 

Ok, so I was naive.  The mall was about 30 miles from my house, and who knows why I worried about what the dog was going to do.  How did they know it was going to happen then, specifically?

*sigh* Kids.

But rumors get currency, then the currency gets spent by spreading along the fastest method possible.  Gossip. 

At any rate, these things come and go.

In this day of click through approvals and websites that have you sign things called "Terms of Service" before you use them, you basically sign all your rights away before you even set up your profile.

Sound familiar?  You probably didn't read it anyway, Right?

We've all done this before, most likely Many Times.

The latest one is that Facebook Privacy Policy.  Face it folks, once you put your face on facebook, you face losing face, as well as signing your rights away.

Oh sure, you have some control.  You could simply not post anything there and have a full life.  You know, like you did before you got addicted to this century's CB radio craze. 

You could put copyright notices on all your pictures, and trust me that is a royal pain in the tail.  Just look at the pictures I have on this blog - they're all "Copyright Noticed" as well as hidden text through them...

But that's getting off the track.

The best suggestion I could give anyone who enjoys using Facebook, and I do, is to think before you share.  Look at what you are typing in and ask yourself "What would Grandma think about this?" or "Would I have to explain this to HR at work?" or perhaps "What would I say about this in an interview?".

There are lists of questions I could mention here but the reality is that if you don't want it known, don't share it.

A Secret Told is a Secret Lost.  If you are curating your life, the time to make the selection is before you share it, not after.

If you think someone could use it against you, don't post it.  That's probably a good rule for life.

The notice is compelling.  It tells you that it "Couldn't Hurt" to try it.  It tries to get you to simply copy and paste the text - which generally isn't the best way to handle a "contract".  Knee Jerk reactions are never the best thought out.

It boils down to you saying "I forbid you to act on anything I wrote including this post."  Cyclical Logic much? 

Third parties perhaps, but Facebook?  That notice will have no bearing.

So forget the post, or delete it if you made it. 

If you are wondering about what I'm banging on about, I'll put it here. 

Better safe than sorry right. Channel 13 news was just talking about this change in Facebook's privacy policy. Better safe than sorry. As of January 3rd, 2015 at 11:43am Eastern standard time; I do NOT give Facebook or any entitles associated with Facebook permission to use my pictures, information, or post, both from the past, in the present, or in the future. By this statement I give notice to Facebook it is strictly forbidden to disclose, copy, distribute or take any other action against me based on this profile is private and confidential information. The violation of privacy can be punished by law (UCC 1-308-11 308-103 and Rome statute). NOTE: Facebook is now a public entity. All members must post a note like this. If you prefer, you can copy and paste this version if you do not publish the statement at least once it will be tactically allowing the use of your photos, as well as information contained in the profile status updates. DO NOT SHARE you MUST copy and paste this. I will leave a comment so it will be easier to copy and paste!!!

How to Fail At Pizza Crust Without Really Trying

I have a lot of recipes.  Many of them I share, some others I don't.

Oh come on, you know you hold back one or two of your favorites if you really like to cook or bake.  After all, how would you know what to bring to a party?

My chocolate chip cookie recipe is one of those.  I'll let you in on a secret though.  Churn your own butter.  It really makes the flavor pop!  Five minutes in the cuisinart later you have butter and buttermilk.  Make biscuits.

But the thing is that nobody ever tells you of the failures.

For every successful cook, there is a trash can full of fallen souffles, burnt biscuits, and wooden roasts.  Things that got undercooked, or overcooked.
Things that got the wrong proportions.
Things that went into the oven and the power went out.
The yeast might have been bad.

Any of those things!

The recipes I share are tested.  I have done them more than once.  I don't do them rushed.  I take pictures.  I marvel at the color of the crust, the flavor of the crumb, and the mouth feel of the flake.

But I have done them before.

Some of them I have done many times before.

Many many.

Really, that many.

But I am on a quest.  The quest for the Grail?  No Monty, not the quest for the Grail, for Camelot is a very silly place.

The quest is for the simplest recipes I can find for a given menu item.  They may take a little extra time or be quirky, but once I get it figured out, they're golden.

Fudge, for example, is dead simple.  Three ingredients for the basics, then toss in your goodies and you're done.  It can even be done in the Microwave by a bright five year old as a treat for mommy.  Doesn't even need daddy's help, and may even be better without it.  You really just have to "warm up" the chocolate and stir it until smooth.

My friends that are non-cooks or even anti-cooks are those who I find the simplest recipes for.  Cooking is one of those things that everyone, without fail, can learn, but they do have to at least try.

I went onto a search.  A quest!  No, not for that damn Grail, Monty, go sit down in the corner.

I was searching for "Three Ingredient Recipes".  Those usually are the ones that you mash together with a fork in a big bowl and then toss in the oven at an appropriate temperature.

Usually 350F.

For about 30 minutes or until done.

I found a lot of them.  Just go to your favorite search engine that doesn't track what you are doing, type in "Three Ingredient Recipe" and find what you are looking for.

At least that was the theory.

I was planning on a two ingredient pizza crust.  It was easy they said.  A cup of Self Rising Flour and a cup of Greek Yogurt.  They warned it will be sticky and they warned to make sure you used the real Greek yogurt and not the crap that has corn starch to thicken it.

I have everything on hand on a daily basis for that. 

The whole weekend I was thinking about trying this.  Seriously.

Ok, I don't have a life.  So give me one, I'll make failed pizza crusts for you, honest!

Finally I decided it was time to do it that day.  I waited until it was time.  I even had someone here who wanted to watch.  "Drop In" friends will do that.  They will help you if you have a task to get done if you make a hint.

So I got out the mixer. 
Dough hook. 
Self Rising Flour. 
Proper Greek Yogurt that was one step removed from Cream Cheese.
The dog got interested and joined us in the kitchen at this point.
Turn the bloody mixer on.
Get the parchment paper and line the cookie sheet while I'm watching the magic happen.
Dust the cookie sheet liberally with flour so it doesn't stick.

They always tell you that when you make a pizza.  Pizza crusts tend to be drier than bread dough.  Put down a lot of flour and knead well.  It is like playing with clay, you have to work it.

Blah blah blah, this is two ingredients, right?

Finally I get bored with watching it spin and switch off the mixer.

I end up with something that looked more like biscuit batter.  Thick and sticky.  I could use it to spackle a wall.

No, really.  I have a hole in the wall I could have slapped this puppy into and it would have sat there on a vertical surface just drying out and ...

Pouring the batter out onto the flour I began to roll it out.

That would be when I found the problems starting.

It stuck to the paper so I added more flour.

It stuck to the wooden rolling pin so I added more flour.

It started making holes in the crust so I added more flour.

At this point it was about a cup and a half of flour total.  This wasn't right.  The parchment paper was turning into a wet sticky mess and fully bonded with the bottom of the pizza dough.

After about 5 minutes more of this silliness, I got another piece of parchment paper and dusted it heavily with more self rising flour.  I was expecting, that, if I ever got this in the oven, it would burst open in a scene that I Love Lucy would have been proud of as the crust would fall out onto the floor and ask for asylum here in South Florida.

Taking the dough and parchment paper, I flipped it on top of the new parchment paper.  A parchment paper sandwich now, I began to peel the dough off the older paper onto the new.

I began to grumble at this thing.

Cursing everyone from the Doughboy on the commercial to the inventor of commercial yeast, I started to pick at the sticky goo.

Thirty minutes later, I was still picking.  I had peeled about a half of the dough off the paper and I simply gave up.

You see, life is a learning process.  You win some, you lose some.  I'm sure you heard that before.

In this case I probably should have simply added more flour to the mixer until I got to where I could work the dough.  At least that was what my baking skills told me.

I didn't.  I wadded up both layers of parchment paper, the glue like batter, and tossed it unceremoniously into the trash bin.

With. A. Thump.

We had Chicken Parmesan sandwiches instead.
With Home Fries since they cook well with no fuss.

I was beaten but not done.  I know I will have that pizza.  Just with my fool proof yeast risen dough.  After all, it is my sister Pat's pizza dough, and I know that recipe like I know the back of my hand.

All the way down to the piece of dried pizza dough that I found stuck to my fingers when I was eating that Chicken Parm Sandwich.

Mmmm Chicken Parm on Home Made Rolls.

Let me tell you the story of Pat's Pizza Dough....

Problems Feeding Your Dog? Check Their Teeth

I always feed Rack, my McNab SuperDog, dry food.

The wet food is too much of a hassle.  Cans, smell, storage, expense.  We just never considered it for Rack or Lettie before him.

At this point we are feeding him Orijen or Acana.  Once they open their plant in Kentucky later on this year we will reconsider and look for another food that is not made in a place that has such lax laws.

These foods currently are made in Canada and the laws up there are much more strict than they are here.  In fact, they're using almost human grade ingredients.  I can't recommend eating it but you could in an emergency.

I simply don't trust the lack of oversight in a Republican Tea-party infested place like Kentucky to produce a dog food that hasn't had food ingredients slip in that were of Chinese origin.  Too many dog food recalls lately, and too many stories of dogs dying of chronic renal failure like Lettie did.  It was why we stopped feeding our pets anything from Purina in the first place. 

If you want to find out what it is like trying to keep your dog alive when her kidneys slowly fail, I invite you to look at this blog for the tag "chronic renal failure".  That would give you some insight why I am so particular as to what my Rack eats.

But there is a drawback with feeding dry dog food.  Some of those pieces of Kibble are extremely hard.  Rack being a very fearful "Beta" dog, he would soldier on but hate eating the stuff.   We didn't understand why until I started putting things together.

Feedings got slower.  He would ignore his food.  He'd eat other foods but ignore what was one of the better foods on the market. He got hungry and began to beg for food whenever I would eat.

Eventually I started to wonder what was going on.  One of the feedings took a solid half hour and I had had enough of sitting on the floor and putting one piece of Kibble of food inside his jowls and cajoling him to eat it.

Sometimes I would pour some yogurt over top of the food and that helped somewhat.

We took Rack to the vet.  The vet first started suggesting different medications and food additives.  I was dubious but listened.  Then the vet suggested homemade foods either in addition to or instead of what the commercially prepared foods that he had been getting.

I finally spoke up that they hadn't looked at his teeth.  They were getting full of tartar, more than I would think is normal in a 2 year old dog.

More medications, preparations, and feeds were suggested.  The whole while he was getting tossed treats.  He would never eat treats without some hesitation.

The treats they always gave before were hard.  This time the treats were soft.  He tore through them like they were long lost friends.

I again insisted that the vet look at his teeth.  The verdict was that I was right, there was a lot of tartar.

A different vet came in, more suggestions, and finally she looked at the teeth too.

He was missing a "Pre-molar" tooth.  No idea how, perhaps it just wasn't there, maybe it fell out, you tell me.

I took control of the discussion at this point.  Because there was no tooth where one should be, he was trying to chew a hard piece of food against a gum.  Might there be pain that was slowing him down?

The suggestion from the vet was softer food.

My solution was simple.  Boiling water.   I now have a hard and fast recipe for soft dog food.  I also still feed the dry food.

One Cup Dry Dog Food poured into his bowl.  Add to it Ounce of Boiling Water.  Stir the food and water together.  The food would eventually absorb the water over the next five minutes.  Allow it to sit until it soaks up most of the water.

The next feeding when I tried this recipe, it was instant success.   Rack immediately ate the food.

No pushing food into his mouth.
No pleading.
No priming the pump at all.

He began eating the food with a relish I haven't seen in a long time.  In fact to say he tore through it would be a fair description.

He has slowed down, after all it is the same food he normally gets.  Dogs do get bored of the same old thing every day.

But the bottom line is that since they can't easily tell you what is wrong you have to watch closely when something is off.   The special diet that people suggest may just be as simple as pouring two tablespoons of water over top of the food and letting it make a gravy to soak in.

The proof is in the gravy, after all.  He will lick the shine off the bowl now to get at the last drop of the gravy.

We're getting better at it.  He is now getting more confident with his feedings.  After all, how would you like it if you had a big 6' 4" guy looming over you begging you to eat your food!

A church is auditioning for bell ringers in the bell tower

A church is auditioning for bell ringers in the bell tower

Many children show up and finally the priest gets to the last one.

Suddenly a little boy with no arms runs through the door and says, "Am I too late?"

The priest wants to go home but asks the child, "How if you have no arms will you ring the bell?"

Without question the child runs head first right into the bell, barely making a noise.
The priest tells the little child, " I am sorry but that is not loud enough. But thank you for trying my son."

All of the sudden the kid runs full force smacking into the bell with all his might and creates the loudest ring the priest has ever heard.

Suddenly the bell falls and crashes down to the ground below causing the child to fall also to his demise.

When the police show up the officer asks the priest, " Do you know his name?"

The priest sadly says, " No, but his face rings a bell."

The Story of Red and Blue

Red and Blue were brothers working aboard a pirate ship.

Apart from being extremely mischievous, they were lazy lads and would almost always be found catching some shut-eye in some desolate corner of the ship.

The captain, though furious, never did do anything about them.

You see, the captain had a wife, long dead of course, but not before she bore him two sons. Red and Blue were just the two devils. He couldn't leave them alone back in their ruthless, pirate hunting hometown, so naturally, he brought them aboard his ship and never let them out of his sight.

 Eventually, as you can probably imagine, the boys got into a big fight with each other. Punches and kicks were delivered, things were thrown.

 The rest of the crew didn't help much either, some took sides, and the others just couldn't be bothered.

There were chants of "Red! Red! Red!" As well as cheers of "Blue! Blue! Blue!".

Pretty soon, some of the crew-mates that took sides began fighting each other as well. It was a right hoe-down. The captain was awoken from his sleep and came down horrified to find the ship messy and filled with men punching and kicking each other.
 
He drew his musket and fired a round into the sky, shocking the men into a standstill.

He demanded to know what was going on, but some of the crew, being in a bad mood, refused to cooperate.

Some were still cheering for the two brothers. The captain, outraged, took action.

The remaining crew mates who were still a vast majority, bound Red and Blue, as well as the dozen or so crew mates taking sides.

They were thrown into a large dingy and given supplies to last them a day, and under the rain of warning shots from the large cannons, the disgruntled crew of troublemakers rowed their way to a nearby island.

On the way there, Red and Blue forgave each other and grabbed each other in a bear hug. The troublemakers, having been touched by the display of brotherly love, began hugging each other as well.

So in the end, team red and blue merged together as one, and were marooned.

Happy Unbirthday or Why I Became 110 Years Old on Facebook

I admit it, I read too much.  It's part of staying up to date in any sort of technical career.

I came across article after article about sharing online.  People share too much data about themselves. 

What they're wearing, well that's kind of harmless right?   No, not really if you have a stalker.  Look for that person in that shirt over there and ...

What they are cooking for dinner?  I'm doing that all the time, but apparently I'm doing it right.  Why?  Well you can see what kind of furnishings you have in that kitchen.  Is there a house alarm on the window?  Good, you can break in there.

Oh look, beautiful vacation pictures!  They went to Hawaii, they won't be back for a week.  Nice TV in the living room in the other picture. 

Not Anymore, Inspector Clouseau.

Get the picture?  Or rather you don't?

It was one after another. 

An article was warning people about putting controversial items up on their Facebook feeds.  After all, if you are radical, your next company or even your current one won't want you.  Nobody wants someone who rocks the boat, right?

I've been self editing that sort of thing for years.  I hardly ever post anything that is "out there", usually everything is supportive, and I'm liking things more than anything else. 

That's a problem too.  If you just Like things on Facebook, it has been shown that things get "weird".  Your feed starts to show things that are more intense than the things you actually like.   For example, if you like animal causes like the local SPCA or Rescue, and I definitely do, you start seeing things for PETA.  PETA is "controversial" to many people because of their "radical" vegan outlook. 

"Nothing with a face" is their motto, and animals first.  They go a bit too far for me, I'm a carnivore, still.  But I do support that they are out there. 

You see the point, things keep getting more "radicalized" if you like absolutely everything.

One of the "data points" that came up recently was about identity and credit card theft.  If "they" have a few things like your name, birth date, and a few other obscure things, "they" can get you a credit card. 

For themselves.

How do they get that? 

You used to get a phone call from someone saying they were from the "Credit Card Bureau" and they would want to "verify a few details".  You're done if you answer that question. 

First off, YOUR credit card company would never call for that.   I have been called by one questioning whether I was really in Florida once, but yes, I was at the beach and it is a lovely day and I wanted to get something in a shop, so please do put that charge through.

One other time, it was after I ordered something from www.Rakuten.com and almost immediately started getting weird charges.  Five Minutes Later I got a call from my credit card asking me if these were valid.  Nope, and thanks!  They stopped that in the bud and I can not recommend www.Rakuten.com as a result

So one of the most important details they said you should never share?

Your Birthdate.

I immediately went into Facebook.  Facebook's business is getting information from you in a "soft" matter.  It is what they are doing when you click on Like. They are building a profile of you.

It is what you signed up for, and personally I am OK with that end of it.

What I didn't like was when I went in to hide my birthday as a recommendation of that security article, I couldn't. 

Facebook would not let you hide your birthday from "everyone".  You had to keep it visible to your friends.  That was the most limited you could go.  Mind you there are a lot of friends in Facebook that you collect through the years of use, and by now it really is "Years" of use, that you really don't know.  Some of them you will never meet, and some of those that I will never meet I consider that a shame.  Some really neat people I have "met" over the years and "friended" that I will never run into, or never run into again.

Others, Who knows what they really are.  They go silent or something happens and they drop away.  You may have said something inappropriate or what have you. Can't really say that happened much to me, but it does happen.

So I changed it.

I moved it from my real birthday to the oldest possible date I could.

January 1, 1905.

I'm expecting a nasty email from them at any day now.

So if you wished me a happy birthday yesterday, thank you, I know you care.  Or I know you had a knee jerk reaction to seeing the thing. 

I do know that those that wished me happy birthday yesterday were those who I know well, and I did appreciate the well wishes then as I appreciated them and their well wishes every day.

But it's not my actual birthday and I am not 110 years old.

If I have to change it again, I think I will make myself 32.  I met my partner then, life was looking up, things were going into a time that just kept getting better.

I'll stop there, I don't want to share too much.

But Happy Unbirthday to me!

Was I right to do this?  I've been told I'm getting paranoid.  Perhaps I am.  I don't know.  But I feel good about "This".

If you are a friend and you perhaps feel a bit manipulated, I apologize completely. 

My bad.
Mea Culpa.

It was not my intent.

Happy New Years from Ramblingmoose.com

Happy New Years to you and yours.

If you have done it up too much last night, well, I won't shout it too loudly.

HAPPY NEW YEARS!

It's time to put away the funny hats, like the one I saved all year and tried to leave with a friend.  Clean up the Champagne Stemware like the picture above that I got from Wikipedia.

Hey, I'm not going to set that picture up, I hate olives and if I am opening a bottle of champagne I will certainly make sure there are some here to help me drink it.  I'm a light drinker anyway!

Besides, Prosecco is cheaper, and as a result, more trendy.  It's just a sparkling wine from Italy with slightly different grapes used.  They won't know the difference!

So take care of yourself, if you're still out, why are you reading this?  Get on home and sleep it off. 

If you go in to work tomorrow and have a hangover, well so does your boss.