Saturday, March 24, 2018

I once tried driving to Mexico to steal a couple pet dolphins. I was arrested for trying to enter the country for illegal porpoises.

A hunter shoots a deer and is pulling it back to his truck

A farmer passes by and says, "Hey you shot that deer on my property. That makes that deer mine."
The hunter says, "No way, I tracked it, I shot it, it's mine."
The farmer says, "Ok Ok...we'll settle this the old way."

"The old way?"
"Yes. We'll take turns kicking each other in the nuts and the first guy who can't take it anymore loses. The winner gets the deer."

The hunter thinks about this and he says, "Ok, let's do it."
The farmer says, "Ok, let me go first." He takes a big wind up and just nails the hunter right in the nuts with his big dirty farmer boots.

The hunter doubles over in pain, huffing and puffing for a few minutes.
He finally gets up, still panting and says, "Ok Ok...I'm still in...my turn."
The farmer says, "Nah, you can keep the deer."

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