Saturday, March 17, 2018
I’m not bragging, but I made six figures this year so they named me the year’s worst employee at the toy factory...
The Thumb King
Once upon a time, there was a Land of Fingers.
Everyone who lived in the Land of Fingers was, appropriately enough, a Finger.
All the Fingers, from mighty Index to cute little Pinky lived together in peace and harmony.
Then one day came Thumb. Thumb was like the Fingers, but different. Shorter, sturdier. Turns out, Thumb worked quite well with the individual Fingers, and everyone found that they could perform better and do more with Thumb's help.
Thumb became so useful to the Fingers that soon they found they could not live without his help.
Thumb began to make demands of the Fingers; first it was just more pay, but then he wanted more and more. A diamond-studded glove, a luxury car, the list of demands became longer and longer.
But what could the Fingers do? They resented Thumb's demands, but needed his help far too much to risk alienating him.
Eventually, Thumb was elected King. And if you think regular Thumb was demanding, King Thumb was worse.
Soon, all the Fingers began to resent King Thumb, for his rulings were tyrannical, and he never, ever trimmed his nail.
The Fingers began to despair, for they feared they would never be able to stand up to King Thumb.
Until one day, when Pinky realized that the Fingers could indeed stand up to the tyranny of King Thumb.
Until then, everyone thought that it was impossible to stand up to Thumb, but Pinky remembered that all Thumbs are, in fact, opposable.