Sunday, October 6, 2019

Cliffhanger puns are extremely frustrating. They just

Since my friends have discovered that I like Dad Jokes and Punny One Liners, I am being sent a bunch of them.  I've got a file sitting on the desktop of my Debian Linux Desktop Computer called "Thirteen Bad Jokes.txt" that is getting quite full of them.

Here are thirteen more of them for your... enjoyment?

My son has adorable little baby hands... I don’t know what he did with the rest of the body.

My tuktuk got stuck earlier in the mud - False advertising should be called a stuckstuck.

Did you hear about the big fight at the seafood restaurant?  There was battered fish everywhere.

3 guys are on a boat with 4 cigarettes but nothing to light them with …so they throw one cigarette off the boat to make the boat a cigarette lighter

I have got a black belt in origami.  I made it myself.

A lady walks into the library, asking for books on paranoia.  The librarian whispers, "they're right behind you".

How many lawyers does it take to fill up an ambulance?  I don’t know, nobody’s ever tried to save one.

My daughter asked for a Cinderella Themed Party.  So I invited all her friends over and made them clean my house.

Whenever I travel I like to open a window.  The airline strongly disagrees.

My wife and I have three beautiful children and three out of five isn't bad.

Talk to your lock calmly if you get locked out because communication is key.

Since when do we have a alarm system?  You are standing on the cat...

How do you make any salad a Caesar Salad ... Stab it 23 times (Et Tu Brute?)

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