One Please

In the early 1800s, a man relocated to the New World to seek his fortunes.

After some time had passed, he was prospering when news arrived that his father was ailing in the old country.

Eager to see his father before he passed, he rushed to a shipping agent to inquire about passage back to the Old Country.

The agent peered over his glasses and asked "How quickly do you need to make passage?"

The man thinks and says "Schooner rather than freighter, please."



On the same vein, here's a bonus!

My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he turned 60 years old.
Now he’s 97 years old and we have no idea where he is...