What's black and white and goes "oom! oom!"? A cow walking backwards.

I have a habit of playing a game with names.  Not with people's names, they tend to get attached to them.  This is with dogs.  If I hear a strange word, I consider how it would sound if I was trying to call my dog back to me. 

It's strange enough calling "Rack" back, but he seems to like to be called, regardless.

There was Ubu who used to sit on TV.  Things like that.

Then there is this particular guy.



A robber breaks into a house while the residents are away one dark night.
Eager to see what he can loot, he quickly starts searching through cupboards and dressers, grabbing valuables with a trained eye.

Suddenly, he hears a voice come out of nowhere. “Jesus is watching you.”
The criminal jumps, scared the residents are back, and freezes.
After a few minutes of silence however, he assumes it was his imagination, and goes back to robbing.
A couple minutes pass, before once again, the voice returns. “Jesus is watching you.”
Quite confused, the thief searches the house and checks the front door, but nothing pops out as unusual.
He finally decides to move rooms, and finds a parrot, but ignores it.

Before he can begin to do anything, someone speaks again, “Jesus is watching you.”
The robber realized it was the parrot talking! Going to the parrot, he asks it, “Are you the one who’s been talking to me?”
The parrot responds, “Yes.” The thief couldn’t believe it. So, he asks another question. “What is your name?” “Ismael.” the parrot replies.
The man scoffed. “What type of idiot names a parrot Ismael?”
The parrot speaks yet again, “The same type of idiot that names a Rottweiler Jesus.”