Sunday, August 19, 2018

Why are postmen so good at telling jokes? They’re great at delivery.

Since it is Sunday when I post this, it's perfect for today.   And, Hey! It's a double feature too!

A new pastor was visiting in the homes of his parishioners.
At one house it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door.
He took out a business card, wrote 'Revelation 3:20' on the back of it and stuck it in the door.
When the offering was processed the following Sunday, he found that his card had been returned. Added to it was this cryptic message, 'Genesis 3:10..'
Reaching for his Bible to check out the citation, he broke up in gales of laughter.
Revelation 3:20 begins 'Behold, I stand at the door and knock.'
Genesis 3:10 reads, 'I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was naked.'

An oldie, adapted, and a goodie.

A plane was about to crash. It had four passengers, but only three parachutes.

First out was a top football player. He said: "My team counts on me, and my millions of fans will be devestated if I die". He took one of the chutes and jumped out.

Next was Donald Trump. He said: "I’m the smartest president america has ever had, and I’m loved all over the world." He took the second chute and jumped out.

The last two were the pope and a 10 year old boy. The pope said to the boy: "I’m old and don’t have many years left, you’ve got your whole life ahead of you. Also, I’m sure to go to heaven. You take the last parachute, and God be with you."

The boy replied: "Thank you for thinking of me, but there is no need for that. The worlds smartest president took my backpack."

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