If God wanted me to fly, He'd have given me tickets.

All the sudden I am getting calls from friends and family.  I guess now that we're 3 years past Covid and lockdowns, people are finally traveling again.  Not me, I'm off to the park to bike, and have had coffee, so I need to burn some energy off. 

However, I can think of this scenario happening ...




 Intercom


A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom,

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, non-stop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax - OH, MY G-D!"

Silence followed, and after a few minutes the captain came back on the intercom and said,

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier; but, while I was talking, the flight attendant brought me a cup of coffee and spilled the hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!"

A passenger in Coach said, "That's nothing. He should see the back of mine!"