Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Queuing for Status

This morning I had a laugh. 

Auntie BBC had up an article about how businesses need to plan a strategy to deal with lines, queues, and delays.  In there was a comment about how in some cases, standing in a queue could be seen as a status symbol.

It was at that point where I spewed my coffee on my monitor and had to get up and change my shirt.

Personally I can't think of an activity that is less rewarding than standing on line. Or in line depending on whom you are talking to.  The anticipation of how long I will stand on line will be the criteria that I will use to decide whether to even bother going into a shop or restaurant.

I haven't been to a Wendy's burger joint in decades.  I went to one, three times I believe.  They have a system of feeding everyone through one or two cashiers as the customers are treated to standing in a weaving line like a series of cattle chutes. 

Quality may be their recipe but you can't prove it by me.  It's just not worth it to stand around looking at your feet while waiting for your calf muscles to lock up for a burger.  There's another fast food joint next door, most likely, lets go there!

When I go to a supermarket, I ignore all the impulse items that are stacked in giant pyramids by the door and seek out the checkout lines.   If they're snaking down the shop to where the frozen food is melting... NEXT!

What gets me is how could they say that it could be a status symbol?  The act of standing in a spot for a posh venue in your Gucci shoes and being seen to do so seems like a rather mindless pursuit.  I can just hear them saying "Oh Muffy, dear, look!  All the peons down there, the little people will see us standing here to get in!".

No, Dear Muffy, they're standing there looking at the fool in five hundred dollar shoes getting sunburned trying to get into a venue and question your sanity.

But then again maybe it would be different if I was a poseur and status seeker.  I'd rather get there before the rush and have a seat.  After all, I'll get that window seat and point at the people waiting to get in while I sip my "cocktail".

Feel like going to an amusement park?  I hear they have a new ride called the Amazing Line Experience!  You can simulate the experience of standing on a 1 hour line waiting to get on the ride.  Just like the real thing except you don't have that messy roller coaster at the end!

You really didn't want to go for a roller coaster ride today, did you?

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