Sunday, January 28, 2018

What vegetable is always burnt? Chard.

After having spent time emptying the dishwasher, making coffee, making dog food, of course I am thinking about making breakfast. 

Just like this wonderful lady! 

The Drunk Man comes home at 3am completely wasted.

Staggering into everything he knocks over the tv, breaks all of the china, and passes out on the floor.

The next morning he wakes up tucked into bed, with a rose and an I love you note beside the bed.

The man walks cautiously into the kitchen, where he smells bacon and eggs being cooked. He cautiously sits at the table and tells his wife good morning.

With a huge smile on her face she asks if he would like 2 pieces of bacon or 4 this morning.

The man says 4 please. But what happened last night?

The wife proceeded to tell him what happened...

Wife: Well you walked in drunk at 3am.. You broke our tv.. destroyed our china... and passed out on the floor.

Husband: Then why are you treating me so well this morning!?

Wife: Well, when I went to pull your pants off to bring you to bed.. You were kicking and screaming.. telling me NO NO, I'm married!

TV: $150 ... China $450 ... Saying the right thing at the right time... Priceless!

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