I get up well before dawn. I have the entire town to myself when I go to the Dog Walk. On the other hand I have to get there before I can have my solace.
Oscar has been getting in a habit of talking at me. Mind you a parrot gets really insistent if you are busy so you have to answer.
Or. Else.
The Old Macaw
A man goes to a pet store looking for a fun pet for his family. There are the typical candidates, kittens, puppies, fish, hamsters, but off in the corner is an old macaw. He asks the owner what the deal is, and the owner replies that the macaw has actually been adopted several times, but he always gets returned within a week because no one really wants him. The man knows that his wife and daughter really want to do some good with this new pet, and this poor old bird seems like just the noble charity case for them all, so he pays the pet store owner and takes him home.
Things are fine for about a half hour, but then the wife evidently got too close to the macaw’s cage, and he squawked, “Get away from me!” and he began to swear at her repeatedly.
The daughter, understandably confused and frightened, started to cry, and the macaw demanded that someone shut her up, and began to curse at the daughter as well.
The father stepped in, but wasn’t sure what to do. It didn’t really make sense to get into a vulgar shouting match with a bird, and he wasn’t about to try to hurt the animal in front of his family, but something had to be done. Acting out of desperation, he grabbed the animal and just stuffed him in the freezer and sealed the door shut with some duct tape.
The bird didn’t like this at all, and his squawked intensified, bolstered by the use of unending swear words, some even from languages that none of them spoke, likely from some of his previous owners. The freezer shook and the squawking went on for about three minutes, until, quite suddenly, everything went silent and the room was peaceful once again.
The father was unsure what had happened, but thought it best to wait a couple minutes before opening the freezer, just to be safe. When he finally did, the macaw stepped out, and for some reason his entire character had changed.
The bird hopped down to the floor, averting his eyes from the father, and apologized sincerely for his behavior. He then turned to the wife, and then the daughter, apologizing to each of them individually and in turn for how he had treated them. For the rest of the afternoon he was as much of a model citizen as any macaw could be expected to be, and the family began to enjoy his company, in spite of how it had begun.
That night, after the wife and daughter had gone to bed, the father was turning out the lights and saying goodnight to the bird, who said goodnight back. Before the father went upstairs to bed, the bird said something else, “Sir, I am sincerely grateful that you have given me a second chance, and I promise that you will not have to tolerate any misbehavior like that ever again… But, if I may ask just one question, I have to know… What did the chicken do?”
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