Saturday, October 10, 2020

I had a date last night and I really enjoyed it. Tonight I'm going to have a fig!

Haven't you looked at your pet, dog, cat or other trusted companion and said: "I wish I could have just 30 minutes to be able to talk with them and have them understand?"

I think this scientist took this a bit too seriously.

A brilliant scientist successfully creates a lifelike deer cyborg.

Dr. Holmes, after many years of biotechnological research, finally succeeded in his secret project, using funds diverted from his research grant. Because the project needed to be kept off the records, Dr. Holmes kept the deer at home.

The cyborg would grow and develop just as a normal fawn would, but it would have the mental capacity of a human being. Dr. Holmes instantly took a liking to the young deer, who he considered to be the son he had never had. He nurtured it tenderly and provided the fawn with all he desired.

Once the deer had begun to mature, Dr. Holmes decided it was time to begin homeschooling the young buck. He taught him to read, write, and speak. Next, he taught him basic arithmetic. Of course, Dr. Holmes decided to teach him science as well.

They started with geology. Unlike the other subjects, the deer struggled from the get-go, failing to grasp any of the basic concepts. One day, the doctor announced a pop quiz. He would hold up a picture of a rock, and the deer would have to identify it. The first rock was a light tan rock.

“Is it an igneous rock?” asked the young buck.

The doctor shook his head.

“Hmm, metamorphic?” the deer tried again.

The doctor shook his head once more. Dr. Holmes then looked at his creation, sighed, and said disappointingly, “It’s sedimentary, my deer bot son.”

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