Saturday, June 17, 2023

What do you call a fish that wears a bowtie? Sofishticated.

 While I "get" this bit of "boomer humor" I kind of feel sorry for her...

Husband dies...

When he gets to heaven he enters the Pearly Gates, so excited to be there.

A few years later his wife dies and gets to heaven.

Once she gets through the Gates, she sees her husband and starts charging toward him with her arms extended seeking his embrace that she longed for the past few years, exclaiming, "Oh, darling how I've missed you and longed for this moment!"

The husband dodges her extended arms saying, "Woahhhh woman, the contract was until death!"

So I'll give you a palate cleanser and a "two-fer".  Maybe this one is a bit more your liking!

A man opened a zoo and was attracting tourists from all over the world. The most popular exhibit was the giraffes, but every night, the giraffes would manage to escape their enclosures.

The zoo owner thought the giraffes jumped over the fence, so he raised the fence up to 2 metres tall. But the giraffes still escaped. Puzzled, the owner raised the fence up to 3 metres tall. And yet the giraffes kept escaping.

Over the next couple of weeks, the owner managed to raise the fence up to 20 metres tall. His efforts were in vain, however, as the giraffes were still escaping every day. He was perplexed and proud at the same time; he owned the world's first giraffes that could jump over 20 metres high.

He kept raising the fence in order to try to keep the giraffes inside. By this time, he had attracted quite a crowd. One onlooker said to another,

"I bet you he'll make the fence over a kilometre tall if he keeps forgetting to shut the blasted gate."

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