For fast-acting relief, try slowing down.

You have to love this kind of subtle humor.  Being from the Philly area, I used to hear this sort of story all the time.  On the other hand, I was attracted to it because it was set on a cruise ship and I know someone in the industry, so who am I to judge?



 
A cruise ship is passing by an island in the middle of the Pacific, when a crewmember suddenly spots a man dressed in rags on the shore, frantically waving at them.

They send an emergency raft to the island, and bring him aboard. He tells them that he'd been stranded on the island for the past five years. After some rest and a medical check-up, he's willing to take them to the island.

When they get there, they see four large huts.

"This one," he says, "is my bedroom. After a long day's work, I can stay here for a while and rest."

"This one is my kitchen. I prepare my food here after scavenging around the island, and then I eat it here."

"And finally," he says, pointing to the third hut, "this is my synagogue. This is where I went three times a day to pray."

"And what's this fourth hut?" they all ask him.

Shaking his head, he says, "Oy! That's the other synagogue. I wouldn't go there if you paid me!"