Thursday, November 10, 2011

The Pitfalls of Shopping Online In Engrish

I hit the deal a day sites and the deal news sites pretty heavily.   I've gotten a lot of things from places that I might not have heard about and got some amazing deals.   The problem comes when you stumble across a website that doesn't do things quite right.

Recently there as a deal on a memory stick.  Ok, so it was beyond ugly since it looked like Santa Claus.  Actually let me take that one step further.  The stick looked like Santa Claus with a USB port shoved up his back side.

But the reason why I tried to get this stick was that it was 1/3 the going price.  $10 for a 32GB stick when the best price I have seen was $30 and you had to jump through Mail In Rebates.

No I won't do a mail in rebate.  They're a gamble by the company that you will forget and not send in the paperwork, dance three times clockwise around your coffee table, pet the dog backwards, and use the potted plants to clean your toilet.  Really, they can be that obtuse to follow.

Just kidding about the coffee table dance, after all how could they prove it?

After getting a deal on some white pocket T Shirts (3 for 10) that everyone here in Wilton Manors will be seeing me wear until they're past their prime, I started on the Santa Drive.  That didn't go well.  You see I have my credit card number memorized including that special code that you are supposed to enter in that lets you buy online in confidence.  Makes life easier, I can sit down think "CC Number" and out from my flying fingers goes a long string of digits. 

After keying in the relevant info, it rejected me.   You see the first problem was that the drive that I was secretly thinking of by now as Satan Claus was on a site that was new.  Also it was in China.  Direct orders from a Chinese website.  Oh joy, that makes me dance around the coffee table in happiness and security.  It turns out that the website was written to about the quality that one would expect from Chinese Goods. 

Badly.

Secondly it was fulfilling payment via Paypal.   That would be a plus in this case except Paypal barfed on my credit card.  Thinking I did it wrong (yeah right!) I did something special.  I got up out of the bouncy Poang Chair and got the physical credit card.  Typed that number in again.

What is that definition I'm thinking of?  Oh right "The definition of insanity is repeating an action and expecting a different result".  Or some such.

So what do I do?  I do the childhood OCD Special Data Entry System on the Keyboard.  I typed it in one. number. at. a. time. slowly. looking. at. every. single. key... twice. 

Strike three I'm out.

Oh wait, Kevin has a Paypal account right?  So I shoot Kevin all that information and he says wow that's butt ugly having a USB port stuck there, but the price is amazing so I'll try.

Thanks Kevin, I got you involved in this battle too.  Battle because he actually got the order in.   When he sent me the confirmation email in a forward I saw his name and three Chinese Characters and thought "this just might not go well".

You see, the problem with Paypal is that contrary to legitimate credit card companies, this hybrid mess immediately takes the money out of your account and pays them so you have no real recourse in case of problems.  It means you end up with some less honorable companies than you would had you been dealing with American Express or Visa or some other real credit card company since they are guaranteeing it.

Have you gotten the idea that I am wary of Paypal?  Good, you're listening!

This went on about a week and we got an email from the company saying that they had cancelled the sale.   We're not completely sure that we were going to get the charges reversed, but Kevin filed a complaint with Paypal.

So if you're brave, and feel like buying from a foreign website, just remember this tale and think thankfully it was "only" 10 dollars we are out.   Still no butt ugly Chinese Satan Claus memory stick but one heck of a wild example of the EngRish language.

From: support
Date: Thu, Nov 10, 2011 at 3:10 AM
Subject: your order
To:


Hello dear friend:

I am the manager form https://www.dealscup.com web site.

First i delegate all of our staff thanks for your business.

our website built not a long time ,so many thing are in development stage.

if something not manage good ,hope you can remind and understanding.

This time i send you email ,just want told you our staff had made a mistake when he edit the production information .the “35"and"36"items you purchase , not 32GB,they are 8GB. the one 32G,is 40$,but now is out off stock .

so he made a stupid mistake .write this items is 32G.

Now your order is processing ,if you still want keep your order ,we will add a gift your order ,

if you want cancel it ,we will cancel it for you. and refund your money.

Sincerely sorry for this mistake ,I know you are a generous friend.

in order to our future business ,I hope this time you can forgive ours mistake.

At last ,i hope our website with your help can he become more and more good .

so can give you more good service .

any goods you want purchase you can suggest to us .we will try our best help you find them ,and provide for you.

Waiting your reply in patience.

Best regards

All of staff

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