Friday, November 9, 2012

Accidental Irish Cream Butter for the Coffee? SURE!

I like Irish Cream.  Once in a while that is since it basically is butter and alcohol.  67 calories of fat and booze.  Three ounces make 200 calories, so it's not something for every day.

Pour the stuff on some ice cream if you really want high test.   Last night I didn't want high test, I wanted to use it in my coffee.  Good dark home roasted decaf coffee with a little sweetener and Irish Cream.

Easy right?   Not when you get it all wrong.

I had just been given the bottle by someone who didn't know to try using it like I did and the bottle was unopened.  Sheepishly I was told by him "I love the stuff but I can't figure out how to use it!".

I'm not a big drinker.  One or two a week is quite enough.  Gin and Tonic, Screwdrivers, that sort of stuff.  A glass of Port is a wonderful luxury.  But I can be creative with Irish Cream.  

I know a British Ex-Pat who swears by the stuff in his evening tea to relax to the British Dramas on PBS.

But the stuff really is cream plus whiskey.  So enjoy in moderation but finish the bottle within 3 weeks once opened.

That is where I got in trouble.   I wanted it cold.  Why I wanted it cold, I just can't say.  Probably so I didn't have to finish it in 3 weeks.   I'm a lightweight when it comes to drink, really I am.  I can't even write like Hemingway, let alone drink like that man!

Put the bottle in the bottom shelf of the refrigerator and wait.  In my case, I waited for about 10 hours.

Three scoops of home roast decaf in the French Press, three packets of Sweet-n-Low, and the kettle was screaming for attention.

Pouring the water on top of the grounds, I gave it a quick stir, then went to the refrigerator.

SnapSnapSnap and the metal ring let go of the cap while the bottle was opened.  Upending the brown bottle over the measuring cup to get 3 ounces of the brown liquid, nothing happened.

Aiming the opening into the light I looked in.  

Looking back at me was a tan clot of something that looked like frozen Sweetened Condensed Milk.  Except it wasn't frozen, merely congealed.

*THUMPTHUMPTHUMP* on the back of the bottle like an errant Catsup container.
"Well!  That didn't work!"
"What's going on out there?"
"I made Irish Cream Butter!"
"The Irish Cream had thickened into butter in the fridge!"
"Wait, you put Irish Cream in the fridge and didn't expect...?"
"Yes, I know, Blond Moment."

I stuck a butter knife into the thickened tan goo and it came back coated as if I stuck it into a stick of butter.  My mind is racing thinking of some more alternatives like making whipped cream out of the stuff if I can ever get it free.

"I'd microwave the bottle if I didn't think it would explode like some weird Mythbuster's moment."

Turning on the tap full hot, I was able to gently melt the "butter" into a liquid again and pour out the required amount.   The bottle is sitting out on the counter just like it was last night, I won't make that mistake again.

So if I do make Whipped Cream out of the stuff, I'll let you know, but for the meantime, feel free to laugh with me at my buttery and sweet mistake.

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