Have you ever tried eating a clock? It's a bit time consuming, especially if you have seconds.

Check your clocks.  It was Spring Ahead weekend here in the US and most of North America who follow this silly practice.

Just pick one, Savings Time or Standard Time.  Stick with it.  I'm already up too early and I don't think I ever adjusted to the time change last time.



What's the best joke you've ever heard?


A teacher asked her class to tell a story with a moral. One of the kids explained how her parents asked her to help in the kitchen, resulting in the food being ready much quicker- the moral being “many hands make light work”. Little Johnny piped up and told a story about his grandad when he saw active service in the military:

“He was in a trench, all his comrades were dead and he was surrounded by the enemy. He decided that the end was coming, so opened his flask of whiskey and downed it in one. After half an hour, nothing had happened, so grandad cocked his rifle, took the grenades from his dead friends and ran over the top, throwing grenades and shooting. When his bullets were all gone, he took the bayonet off and killed every remaining soldier.”

“Well Johnny, that’s some story, but I’m struggling to understand the moral”.

“It’s pretty simple. You don’t mess with my granddad if he’s had a drink”.