Replace Your Lost Windows 7 DVD

This happens from time to time.  You have a computer with Windows 7 and it got all confused, maybe even you got a virus.  You now need to reload it from scratch.   Going for a hunt through the house, you managed to lose all of your stuff that came from the manufacturer when you bought the machine a year or three ago.

You could be like me, getting a computer either second hand or from an auction and it comes "With No Operating System".

So how do you get the discs legally?

First of all, on your machine somewhere you have a sticker.  It's a little blue sticker with a lot of weird writing on it and generally looks like this picture below:

If you or your 5 year old peeled that sticker off and it is lost, you're done.  Go buy a new copy somewhere.

After all, I *AM* talking about getting the discs legally.

The first line of text on the sticker will tell you what you are entitled to for the computer.  In the case of the sticker above it says "Windows 7 Pro OEM".  That's short for Windows 7 Professional.  My own machine is Windows 7 Home Prem - short for "Premium".

The "Product Key" with the jibberish after are five sets of five characters separated by dashes.   You need that "Number" for your install.

Next, Surf this page.  If the page is gone, you'll have to do a search for it elsewhere, I can't help you past that.   If this page is quite old, you may not be able to find your discs, so if you need them, you want to do this now.

In fact, if you have a Windows 7 computer, go grab the discs you are legally entitled to and download them now.  You may need it years in the future, you may never need it.  Blank DVDs are cheap, Psychiatry is expensive, you choose.

Now determine which version of Windows 7 you need and find the link.   The link is what is called an "ISO" file, and that will be a large image. 

Make sure your computer has at least 4 GB of empty space.  Click Start, My Computer or Computer, then look  for your "C:".   Windows 7 will tell you how much free space you have there.

Download the link that best describes the version of Windows 7 you need.  That was that first line on the sticker.

Wait for the file to download.   Should take a while... Go make some snacks or a mug of coffee, I'll be here when you get back.

There you go.  Now, the file is there.   You'll have a large ISO file that you will need to burn using your favorite CD Burning software.   If you never have done that, I suggest this software called CD Burner XP.   It's free, and works pretty well.

Once you have your disc ready and downloaded and burned... have fun.   Like I said, this is the legal way to do it.  If you're a Pirate, you are looking at the wrong blog.  Sorry there folks...

One suggestion.   Go to the website for your computer.  Find the support and downloads page and download all the drivers you will need for Windows 7.  Place them on their own DVD/CD.  You don't necessarily want to use a Memory Stick since you may not be able to use it on the machine once you installed Windows.   I had that happen before and ended up burning the disc afterwords in frustration.   My own experience is that you need the minimum of the following list just to get you to the point where the computer is able to get to the internet to get the rest:

Wifi or Ethernet Network Drivers
Video Drivers
USB Drivers

You may need others like Sound and other special drivers, but once you can get to the internet you can go back and download those at will.   If you have a genuine Windows 7 computer, you will have no problem since most of the drivers are either included on the DVD or are available from Microsoft or the Manufacturer once you are running.

Good luck!

Windows 8 Should be Called the Why Should I Operating System

A while back I was given a task.  Take an empty computer, install the latest version of Windows 8 on it, and write about it.

First impressions hadn't changed my mind.  After two weeks I'm looking for a reason, any reason, to dump Windows 8 and go back to my comfortable Windows 7.

The hardware is competent, it's certainly fast enough to do the job.  I won't go into fiddly numbers, this is one of those "Functional" things, meaning it's more important how something functions rather how you get it to function.

You know, "Don't ever learn how sausage is made if you enjoy it".

I'm accepting quirks like my USB devices forgetting that they actually work since I'm using all Windows 7 drivers to get the machine working.   Most manufactures aren't supporting Windows 8 officially yet.  To blame Microsoft for that sort of thing would not be fair.

The problem is that they took the beautiful Windows 7 with its "Aero" interface and lobotomized it.

It now looks like Windows 2.0 where everything is flat and hard to read.   Primary colors are back.  Although you can configure some of that away, Why Should I?

And that is the biggest thing wrong with Windows 8.  I keep asking "Why Should I?".

Things that worked on a laptop or desktop machine since 1995 with Windows 95 loudly proclaiming "Start Me Up", simply need work arounds.

You can't find any of the folders that you're used to having like the old "Start up Folder".  That means that if you have a program that you like to have running when you start your machine, either you have to start it, or literally create a shortcut on how to do that.   They removed the start up folder's link from the Start Screen.

Now think to yourself, You are Joe Average PC User.  You really don't want to learn how this thing works, you want it to "Just Work" and just work every time.  Not wanting to make sausage here, how exactly do you create a short cut in windows?

Right click where you want the icon.
Select New.
Select Shortcut.

Great!  Now you have a new icon on your desktop and with Windows 8 you happily find yourself presented with a wizard that says "What item would you like to create a shortcut for?" and a browse button.

Microsoft has forgotten that Mr or Mrs Average PC Guy doesn't know or care where that item has gone.

For me, the location for the short cut I had to browse to is (and here's a little sausage making):
"C:\Users\Bill\AppData\Roaming\Microsoft\Windows\Start Menu\Programs\Startup"

Ok, so ask yourself average person, "How would I have found that?"

I didn't, I had to look it up online with a search.  I found the article fairly quickly, but I had to ask myself "Why Should I?" yet again.

They really should rename Windows 8 "Why Should I?".

In other words, as a regular PC user, "Why Should I?" be replacing things (functionality) in Windows that were taken out?

That is just one small thing that they did.  I have been told that Microsoft has been wanting to remove that for years and just got around to it.  The reasoning is that "App writers should include the auto-start functionality in their apps and not depend on Windows to do that".   Problem is that the app writers generally don't.

So if you're considering Windows 8, this is just one small reason why you really want to hold onto your Windows 7 or good old trusty Windows XP for a while. 

The numbers coming in are apparent that Windows 8 will be widely disliked by the market.  The "Pre Launch Adoption" rates for Windows 8 are 1/5 of the rate of Windows 7 at this time.  You can read more about that in this article from ComputerWorld, if you're in the mood for more sausage.

I personally am going to bang out more articles on Windows 8 and try to get this project done quickly so I can remove Windows 8 from this machine and go back to Windows 7.  It truly has been a maddening experience.

I'm sorry Microsoft, you really do need to rethink this one.

Writer's Block and Tortilla Chips

Staring at a blank page again? 

Writing down random thoughts?

Then you too can enjoy the exciting world of writing.

Contemplate the mosquito banging it's thoughtless head on the glass as you stand at the window making your second mug of coffee.  

Watch the rain strike the ground and leave concentric rings of displacement on the pool as you say "Oooh Cool, maybe I should write about that!" and realize nah, you've written about rain, pools, and mosquitoes before.  Sometimes even wrote entertaining bits about them.

See the iguana try to own the concrete patio in the back yard as you remember you have to add some very devious "Special Food" to the shopping list to relocate the green monster "elsewhere".

Grab the tablet computer and find an old music stream and think how it is that nobody uses real instruments any more and everything is synthesized. Consider that it's not completely a bad thing to use synthesizers or acoustic instruments.  Realize that you're better off not listening to some kinds of music since you truly despise electric guitars.

Watch the flag in front of the house flutter the wrong direction in the breeze and wonder if that means it's going to be another stormy day since the wind is coming from the South and not off the ocean.

Think that all that above is a "load of bollocks" and realize that you forgot to make tortilla chips for dinner.  Start searching online and find a recipe for it and decide that you'll put it here:

Preheat oven to 375
Brush tortillas lightly with olive oil on both sides, dust lightly with salt or other seasoning.
Place oily salty tortillas on cookie sheet taking care not to have them touch.
Toss cookie sheet in oven for 10 minutes.
Judge for yourself whether they are "done enough" and flip for another couple minutes - repeat until you're happy with the results.

Then realize you're a white guy from South Jersey who should probably leave Mexican Cuisine to the experts even if you are going to make Quesadillas for dinner.

Happy Birthday Pat

Hey, Happy Birthday!

No, I didn't tell anyone which one this is.

Yep, sure is, welcome to the dark side.

Hey, there are a couple of those Dark Side birthdays, right?

What's that?  Going out tonight for a special dinner?

Hope so, no everything's pretty much the same here.

Where's he taking you again?

Never been, but I've been away for a while.

It must have opened before I left.

It sounds real nice, I know how you like that kind of restaurant.

Yep, six years.

Was just looking back at some of those old pics. 

If I find some I'll scan them and send you the cleaned up versions, but you have more of those than I do here.

Not too many made it here in the big move.

Nope, newest one of him was when he was 16.  I still have that pic in the frame you gave me all those years ago.  Mom's pic and Aunt Betty too. 


Glad to hear he's OK too.

No, Betty's pic was one she sent all of us in that little frame.

Yes,  I know you're a Jersey Girl.

Well maybe some day you'll come down for a visit.  We have the room.  It would be tight but just like old times.

Sure you will, you never liked all that ice either.  Snow can be pretty but ice?  Yuck.

Yeah I know, got over it.  Like we say "In my drink, not on my lawn".

Ok, good to hear from you too.  Glad all's well up there.  Don't be a stranger!

The Jamaican Lawyer - Humor

 I'm not quite sure why this would be specifically a "Jamaican Lawyer", but in the joke's defence, I can certainly see every Jamaican I've ever known using this kind of logic.

Mon.

So stir up some Callaloo and serve it with some Jerked Chicken, here's a little joke for you!

The Jamaican Lawyer


A Jamaican-born lawyer defending a man in New York accused of burglary tried this creative defense:

"My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offence committed by his limb."

"Well put," the judge replied. "Using your logic, I sentence the defendant's arm to 5 year's imprisonment. He can accompany it or not, as he chooses."

The defendant smiled.

With his lawyer's assistance he detached his artificial limb, laid it on the bench, and walked out.

...Don't mess with a Jamaican!

Alligators in the Pool For a Party? Only In Florida!

I guess this has to be called "Weird Florida".

I grew up hearing how weird New Jersey was, but frankly it's pretty normal.  There were some amazingly beautiful areas once you got away from the inner ring suburbs of New York, and Philly.  We did have the Jersey Devil, some folks thought I was him, but no.

Here in Florida we've got some really strange critters.   People seem to feel they need to have exotic creatures around them that don't belong here.  Dogs and Cats don't exactly fit in our ecosystem either but we tend to make an exception.

Then there are those who thought it would be a good idea to keep an iguana in the house.  Eventually they escape and now you have them running around eating Bougainvilleas bare.  Apparently to an Iguana, Bougainvillea are addictive.  Iguana Crack.  I find them in the pool when they start to breed beyond a certain level and frankly now that they're back I'm looking forward to a good strong cold snap.

But those aren't natives, and they don't belong in my pool.

There's always someone who will try to tame the un-tameable.  Those folks I just keep a healthy distance from.  You never know when something like that will bite.  

Like a gator.  You know, Alligator.   There's a guy over in John's Pass on the west side of the state who rents one of them out.  Apparently, the creature is tame enough to swim in the pool, intentionally.  With your nine year old daughter.

I wonder if he wants an iguana or twelve?

So the gator is tame enough to swim with the kids in the pool, with its mouth taped shut of course.  It supposedly likes it too.   I know my own dog doesn't like the pool but there are some that do, so I can accept that.

I guess this is one of those Shrug And Move On things for me.  While it isn't exactly natural for a gator to chose a swimming pool instead of a nice warm swamp, it easily has a way of letting you know if it doesn't like it.  (SNAP!) 

See... a gator in a pool... It really happened.

If you would like to read more, Bay News 9 has the whole article and more pictures like the one above.  I'm just going to wander off, scratch my head in mild amusement, and make more coffee.

Since the state Wildlife Commission is looking into this, they'll determine if cruelty is happening to the gator.  As for me, I'm willing to let that go its course.

The 6AM Gecko Hunt

We were out for a walk that morning.  The sun hadn't yet risen completely and the morning clouds were lit a brilliant red from below. 

I was standing at the foot of the drive looking at the spectacle when I began to be pulled toward the front door by Mrs Dog.  Half asleep, not having had the first of my coffee, I was surprised at her insistence.  Something was amiss and we had to get to that front porch and do it quickly.

By the time I had rounded the car and navigated past the planter, I saw a dark flash retreat as the lighting came up to full.  I wasn't quite sure what little critter was hiding in the door jamb but I had my suspicions.

Mrs Dog knew right off the bat, it was her old archenemy, the Gecko.

I pulled out my flashlight and focused the beam to the broadest setting.  That meant that instead of it being a pin spot, the equivalent of a 75 watt light bulb was spread broad so it wouldn't completely blind the creatures of the night.

Spotting the tail of the little pink lizard hanging over the top of the door, I knew that I would have to try to convince it to move or else there'd be another inhabitant of the living room today.

Stepping back to the garden, I found a leaf that had fallen from the screw palm and used it to tickle the Gecko.   It didn't work.   They're very shy creatures and they usually try to hide.  I've had them try to hide on my legs and head up into my shorts before so I do know what I'm talking about.

Thankfully they're more amusing than anything else.  No teeth so even if you do find a particularly cantankerous lizard, it's harmless.  I'm told little girls will get them to bite their earlobes sometimes to have Gecko Earrings, but I have never seen that first hand.

Without trying to harm this little pink creature, I knew that I would either have to be more aggressive with my Screw Palm Leaf Weapon, or just open the door and hope that when it's deciding to move, it's going to move out and not in.

Fifty Fifty Shot, right?

At this point things began to happen quickly.

The door opened slightly. 

The dog had never lost sight of where the creature was. 
She may be old, have dodgy kidneys, and a weak thyroid, but her eyes are perfect.

Hearing the bark was the first thing that told me that the Gecko had moved.  

Feeling it hit my forearm first, I began to recoil slightly, being startled.

The Gecko didn't like that and bounced onto the door.

Now, the dog was jumping at the door as the little translucent creature was running away.   Right into the door jamb.  This time it was behind the hinges.   It's little pink brain furiously looking for an escape from the insistent dog and the curious human, it ran to the highest hinge. 

I could have closed the door and been done with the predawn drama, but that would be needlessly cruel. Besides, these creatures give me an enormous amount of entertainment simply by their being around.

I bent down to unlatch the dog from her harness, and gestured for her to go indoors.   She did but that merely gave her a view of the gecko in the morning gloom.

BARK!

Shaddap Dog you'll wake the neighbors!

Wielding the almost forgotten Screw Palm leaf, I tickled the gecko again.  It had the common sense to run away from the leaf and around the door to the outside.  Blocking the dog who was trying to get a purchase on the floor and looking like Wile E Coyote, Super Genius, I quickly shut the door.

Drama averted, nobody harmed except the dog who finally collided with the door with a soft thump.

Time for Coffee everyone, nothing to see here, lets move on!

So, how did you start YOUR day?

What did you do with your old Smartphone

After reading this article on Lifehacker, I was left smiling.

So very much bile and grief.

Ok, so you have a smartphone.  It's older than your contract.  Get it unlocked.   You can even do that with your AT&T Phones.  Mostly, anyway.  There are some phones that are simply hardwired to be with the company you got it from.

My being the king of electronic repurposing, there area a lot of uses that you can get out of the little beasts.

You will want to remove the SIM.   That's the little chip that tells the phone to talk to the cell towers.  If you managed to get it unlocked, you still can use it for "Old Times Sake" or just give/sell/pass it on to someone else.  But that SIM is required in the new phone to make it work like a phone.

Some of the things I use my hand-me-down smartphones for are:

One of them is unlocked.   I use it when my "real" phone is dead.  Swap in my SIM and now I'm back on the air.  You can even use it when you're in a bad neighborhood so you don't lose the "good phone".

Load it up like an iPod and walk around listening to the same tracks over and over because I can't stand having iTunes on my laptop phoning home every couple hours.   At least that is easier to deal with on Android.  Fewer programs to "manage" my music preferences.

Download a copy of Magic Jack for emergencies.  You can make free phone calls in the US using your Wifi and this software.

I keep one on the nightstand for when I wake up.  Since the "regular" phone is on charge, I turn this thing on and use it to check up on Radar/Weather/News/etc. 

Internet Radio is great when you have a wifi-only no-longer phone smartphone.  I use a program called TuneIn and can listen to all those streams or radio stations from outside of the house when I'm tired and want something new.

No, this isn't earth shattering news.  But it is better than tossing it in a drawer and then in the trash in a few months.  May as well use the thing, after all you paid for it, and really you paid quite a lot for it.

Lettie's Burgers

When it comes to hamburgers, I have a simple recipe:

Meat, Heat, and Eat.

I don't want salt.  Never really cared for it.
Keep your pepper.  Jalapenos are an obscenity.
Cheese belongs ON the burger, not IN it.
Same with Onions.

On the other hand, I've found that since my dog, Lettie, has been diagnosed with Chronic Renal Failure, I have to be flexible with what I feed her.

We tried the Boiled Burger Meat with Rice.   She ignored it.
We tried Pan Fried Burgers and Grilled Burgers.  She liked those, but they were too high in protein to do more than 4 ounces a day.
The Vet suggested Tofu.  She hated that and bared her teeth at it.

So I started playing with recipes and even found a way that I could use the Tofu and not have it change the taste.  If you're looking for a way to experiment with Tofu, this is a good start.

Here is what I came up with:

2 Pounds  Burger Meat.  I used 75% lean, AKA Don't Eat This At Home.
1/2 Cup Bread Crumbs
1/2 pound firm Tofu
2 Whole Eggs

Place Burger Meat in large mixing bowl.
Crack two eggs over top of the Burger Meat.
Crumble tofu over top of the Burger Meat.
Mix all ingredients together well.
Add Bread Crumbs to meat and mix together well.

The Bread Crumbs should be added separately after the other ingredients are evenly mixed.   They will help to soak up some of the extra moisture from the Tofu.

These burgers will grill well, the texture will be lighter than a "plain burger" with no additives.  Any burger's texture will vary based on the amount of additives and moisture that are in the mix, so make sure that you watch over them while cooking. 

I grilled mine on a propane grill that was turned to the maximum setting and got the results you see below.  2 Ounce Burgers... with two 4 Ounce Burgers for me later.

Clear your Sinuses in 20 Seconds

Ok, this is a quick and dirty one.  I read about this trick over the weekend and just tried it.  Frankly it's one of those things that I don't need here in Florida since I'm only 2 miles from the ocean and the breezes keep the nasties away.  I wish I knew about this when I lived in New Jersey and everyone else's pollution kept floating overhead.

1)  Take your finger.  Any finger.  Place it between your eyebrows and press for 20 seconds.

2) Press your tongue flat against the roof of your mouth at the same time.

3) Within 20 seconds you should feel your sinuses at least start to clear.

4) Repeat as needed.

I tried it this morning and... excuse me, I'll be needing a tissue in a bit.

If you want to see the write up on it in Reddit, check out this link.