I have to say these two came out of left field.
First off, I am or will be okay.
I had a terrible accident yesterday after work, but I am doing better now.
I decided to go horseback riding, which I haven't done in quite a while.
Well, I got on the horse and started out slow, and then we went a little faster, and then we were going as fast as the horse could go.
All of a sudden I fell off and caught my foot in the stirrup and the horse was dragging me around in a circle.
It wouldn't stop, it just kept going around and around.
Thank goodness the store manager at K-Mart came out and unplugged the carousel.
A man goes to get a haircut, and the barber starts to make friendly conversation with him.
Barber: So the other day, I was mowing the lawn because my kid was at work and couldn’t do it. My neighbor was taking a walk, and came up to me and we started talking.
Neighbor: It’s a nice day out, isn’t it?
Barber: Yeah, but it’s a little harder to enjoy because I’m a bit sweaty. I’ve been mowing the lawn for about 4 hours now.
Neighbor: But your yard isn’t even that big, how does it take you that long?
Barber: Well, to be fair, I can only use one shaver at a time.