Why was the scarecrow good at lacrosse? He was outstanding in his field.

I have to say that I have no doubt that this sort of thing has happened before.  




 A man sat alone at an ultra exclusive restaurant with a three month waiting list

As the waiter stepped up filling his wine glass and to take his order, he smiled politely and asked, “What brings you in tonight? Special occasion?”

The man raised his wine glass toward the empty chair across from him and said, “It’s my beloved wife’s birthday.”

The waiter’s eyes softened with sympathy. “I am so terribly sorry for your loss, sir. The appetizers are on us tonight. May your memories of her be as warm as these appetizers.”

The man smiled warmly. “Thank you so much. I'll be sure to tell her when I get back home.”

The waiter confused “Wait... isn't she...?”

The man took a sip of his wine. “No, she's fine. We just couldn’t find a babysitter for tonight and I will take a Pan-Seared Foie Gras for that appetizer”