Why was the fish let go from his job? The company was scaling back.

Ahh spammers.  I have to laugh at them.  May as well, they won't stop.  They probably are nothing more than a phone on a wall in a third world nation.  

As for Political Spam I am getting, I am torn between simply delete and spam block or just sending 43 copies of my middle finger in a picture.  Comic relief that is.




Papa mole, mamma mole and their two baby moles were in their tunnel beneath the grocery store.

Papa mole stopped, sniffed, and said, “Oooh, we’re underneath the sugar now.” 

A little later he stopped, sniffed, and said, “Oooh, we’re underneath the honey now.” 

A little more time passed and papa mole stopped, sniffed, and said, “Oooh, we’re underneath the maple syrup now.”

After the moles got home, the two baby moles asked mamma mole whether she was able to smell the sugar, honey, and maple syrup. 

She said, “Not as well as your papa, but yes. Couldn’t you two smell them?”

The baby moles looked at each other and one spoke up, “To be honest, all we could smell was molasses.”



This one I think I used before.  So I'll turn this into a two-fer in case someone hasn't seen it yet.  



"God will save me"

In a small town by the riverside, it started to rain heavily. As the water levels began to rise, the townspeople started to leave, except for one very religious person. They said "God will save me".

At first, an army bus was helping evacuate the people. The person refused the bus, saying "God will save me".

As the water rose, the person had to climb to the second floor to not drown. At this time, a boat appeared and offered help. Once again, "God will save me". The boat left.

Rain continued, the water rose even more, forcing the person to go to the roof. A rescue helicopter appeared, but once again, "God will save me".

The water continued rising and the person drowned. Once in heaven, they went to God and asked "Lord! Why didn't you save me? I was a loyal servant for my whole life!"

To which God replied: "I sent help! I sent you a bus, a boat and a helicopter!"