Ok, it's a bit edgy of a subject for me to post, but since there are no "Bad Words" why not?
The Irish Prostitute
The Irish daughter had not been home for over five years. Upon her return, her father cursed her heavily saying, "Where have ye been all this time, child? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother through?"
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff,....Dad....I became a prostitute..."
"Ye what? Out of here ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this Catholic family!"
"OK, Dad-- As ye wish, but I just came back to give Mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a £1million bank account. For me little brother, this gold Rolex. And for ye, Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes Limited Edition convertible parked outside plus a membership to the golf & country club...(takes a breath)... And an invitation for ye all to spend New Year's Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera ."
"Now what was it ye said ye had become?"
Girl, crying again, "Sniff sniff... A prostitute, Daddy! Sniff, sniff."
"Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, Girl!
I thought ye said a Protestant.
Come here and give yer old Dad a hug!.