Friday, January 16, 2015

When Someone Brags About MPG Just a Little Too Much

I was told this story years ago.
I have heard it retold many times.
Each time, the details change slightly, as all good stories do.

It was told to me about back in the days of the Air Cooled Volkswagen Beetle, but it could just as easily be told today about a Toyota Prius.

I'm sure it has been.  I'll just stick to the original.  I was walking down Wilton Drive last night with Rack and Kevin and Kevin was beginning to tell it back to me.  When he mangled it, I of course jumped in with both boots and retold it as I remembered it.  I'll try to put pen to paper here, maybe you'll enjoy the story too.

The story goes that there was a guy who bought a new VW Beetle and was astounded about how good the car was on gas. This was in the days of the big slow turning V8s that got single digit gas mileage.

Yeah, its the US and we still use Miles.  Deal with it.

The guy came to work one too many times, told the story how he was getting better than twice what the big Chevys, Chryslers, and Fords got.  Working in an office where people saw each other each day, maybe met after work for a few at the corner bar or pub, well this was a group that stuck together.

But they heard the story one time too many and decided something had to be done.

Knowing that Beetle Guy was in an inside office all day, the Ringleader hatched a plan to mess with his head.

What Ringleader was going to do was go out each day and add a little gas to the car.  After all, you're not ruining the car, you are just giving Beetle Guy a little extra gas.  Free!

About a week later, the stories started coming back louder and stronger!

"Guys! You won't believe it!  The car's breaking in and I'm getting better and better mileage!  I swear I could drive a month on this tank!".

Cue the snickering behind their hands.  "Yeah, we all heard it before".  They feigned indifference.

Ringleader said "Oh yeah?  You must be getting three times what I get in my old Ford.".
Beetle said "Yeah! I think I could drive all the way to the city, down to the shore, up to the mountains, and all on one tank!"

At this point it had been going on for a while and the stories got longer and shriller.  Beetle was thinking about taking the car cross country "Since I'm getting this amazing mileage!".

It was time to change tactics.  The ringleader waited until Beetle guy went into his office and he told the crew what was next.

Ringleader said "Ok, guys!  Instead of adding a gallon a day, now I'm going to take it back!  I'm going to siphon a gallon a day out of the tank.".

The office roared in laughter.  Ringleader went out on the first coffee break and siphoned out a gallon.  Poured it back into his car.  After all, he's just reclaiming what's his, right?

This siphoning went on all week.

It didn't take long.  The bragging from Beetle Guy stopped almost immediately.  People started asking questions.  "What happened with your car? We're not hearing about it any more.".

Beetle guy said "I don't know what happened!  I was going along with the car getting 50 MPG!  I could go anywhere!  It never emptied, that gas gauge never moved, then all the sudden it went nuts!  I have an appointment for the first service this week so I'll ask there!".

Ringleader egged him on "Why, buddy?  Doesn't that car get amazing mileage anymore?".

Beetle Guy said "I'm not sure, I'm so disappointed with it now.  I'm even thinking about trading it in!".

It was this point where Ringleader "fessed up".

"It was us.  You were bragging so much with the car, and going on and on about how many MPG you got and holding it over our heads we had to do something!".

Beetle guy was wondering and not sure what to expect.

"Last month we added a gallon a day to the VW.  This month, we took a gallon a day back!"

So you see, sometimes when you brag, a little too much, someone comes by and siphons your gas tank!

That Karma thing works even in a Car.

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