Sunday, July 1, 2018

I saw a new color in a dream last night. It was a pigment of my imagination.

Ok, maybe I should have added this one to the bottom of yesterday's post.  Judging from the international response I got...

There are a lot of you out there that like my disturbed jokes!



A couple that has been married for 20 years...

There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every morning, the husband would wake up and blast out the biggest, loudest fart in bed. The wife was quite disgusted with the practice and repeatedly asked him to stop, but he just chuckled. She told him "One of these days you are going to fart your guts out".

The practice continued, unabated. Finally the wife decided to play a trick. While at the butcher she picked up some chicken entrails. The next morning she awoke early and carefully put the entrails into her husband's boxers while he slept. Then she went to the kitchen to wait.

Sure enough, a few minutes later there was a trumpet blast from her husband's ass. She chuckled to herself and waited, sipping her coffee, for him to come out.

It took quite some time, but when he came to the kitchen he was looking a bit ashen. She waited and he told her...

"Well, you were right. This morning I did fart my guts out. But, by the grace of god and with these two fingers, I pushed them all back in."

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