Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Your Computer is Slow Because It's Patch Tuesday

When I worked at a small insurance company Back In The Day, we had a user.   A specific user.

She was someone who my boss called The Squeaky Wheel.  

She was The Wheel for short.

She would field calls and do inquiries on people's insurance accounts and wonder why "things are slow". 

Back in that day, computers were not very scalable - you couldn't make them faster or bigger without some major surgery done by some cadre of people dressed in suits and ties carrying black bags.  If that wasn't surgery I don't know what it was.

Basically that company had too small of a computer for the people who needed to use it. 

New Jersey people would recognize that as a "Blivit" - 10 pounds of crap in a 5 pound bag.

Today is Blivit day for everyone reading this.   Even if you don't use a Windows computer, the internet will be slightly slower.  

Why?

Well Microsoft has done their work.  They squashed some bugs, fixed some exploits, and solved some problems.   That means that your windows computer wants to download those patches which means if you are on a slow connection, like that insurance company, you're going to have a slow day.

That's OK, Microsoft did their job, your computer will be safer.   Now if we could just convince them that Windows 8 Interface with the butt-ugly start screen was a mistake and turned our nice little kitten of Windows 7 into the Blivit of the Decade...

This is for Windows XP, Windows 8, Windows Server, and a bunch of other things including Internet Explorer and "stuff under the hood".

Never mind, just relax.   Switch to decaf.  Oh and lay off the sugar, we all have too much of that.

If you want to read a bit more about it, there is a write up on this link at Sophos' Naked Security blog.

I think it will be an excellent day for me to work on that graphics project on my Linux machine and bring that one website up to the next level... again.

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