Why can't you outrun a tomato? Because they always ketchup!

 Ok, this did actually give me a mild chuckle this morning.  After having walked 2 and a half miles, in what passes for cold here in South Florida Winter, Why not?


What is the (literal) oldest joke you know?

Mine is this, which is from Ancient Greece:

A man is feeling unwell, so he goes to the doctor. Doctor tells him “You have to stop drinking wine. If you have even one more glass, it will kill you.”

A few days later, the doctor happens to be walking past a tavern when he sees his patient through the window, drinking wine.

The patient catches the doctor’s eye at the same time. He chugs his glass, then rushes up the stairs to the top of the building. He hurls himself off the roof, breaking his neck.

The doctor rushes over. “Why the hell did you do that?” The patient smiles weakly and says “Well doctor, you have to admit it wasn’t drinking wine that killed me.”