Ok, try not to read the third one like "Bob and Doug McKenzie", eh?
Wife: Okay, Friday's pay day. Where's your pay envelope?
Man: I already spent all my pay. I bought something for the house.
Wife: What? What could you buy for the house that cost $580?
Man: Eight rounds of drinks.
While reading the newspaper, Walter came across an article about a beautiful actress and model who married a boxer who was not noted for his IQ.
"I'll never understand," he said to his wife, "why the biggest jerks get the most attractive wives."
His wife replied, "Why, thank you, dear."
... is walking down the street with a case of beer under his arm.
His friend Doug stops him and asks, "Hey Bob! Whacha get the case of beer for?"
"I got it for my wife, eh." answers Bob.
"Oh!" exclaims Doug, "Good trade."
.. Do you love me just because my father left me a fortune?
She said.. Not at all honey, I would love you no matter who left you the money.